Late night rambling...

It is a few minutes after midnight and here I am with a wandering mind. A mind that can't help but think of the what ifs and what needs to happens. It has been about nine months now and still to this day my mind wanders vigorously about such things. A part of me is somewhat fine with it because I wish to hold onto memories that are pleasant. However the more I wish to think about such things my heart aches leaving myself feeling hopeless and defeated. It is a lose-lose situation.

Life has a funny way of showing you what's not meant to be. Actually I dont find it funny at all. The surprises and whatnot I could definitely do without. It has been said that "good things come to those who wait" but enough is enough sometimes. I am tired of waiting for the good to come, I have been patiently waiting and watched good things happen to those around me but when will it be my turn? When will I finally smile something real? When will I sing my happy tune? When will the sun shine for me? It has been nine long months and I know this is barely the beginning. I just wish it was near the end, goodnight.


xoxo,
alicia.


PS.
This was written with my phone; excuse the typos.

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